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Tag goal setting

The right mentor matters

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I was at the bank the other day and noticed their new advertising campaign. Invest in yourself: The right mentor matters.

 

It sure does.

 

Their poster boy of choice is Jamie Oliver. As they say, even Jamie has a mentor. Italian chef Gennaro Contaldo. And it makes sense doesn’t it. To achieve that level of success, there must be have been somebody to guide him. Somebody to teach him the skills he needed to make it all happen. Somebody wiser and more experienced.

 

While mentoring is an age old practice, it’s becoming increasingly popular in the modern world. Because mentoring is one of those great life-hacks. In business, in sport, in career development, in fact in every aspect of life. When you have a burning desire to create something in your life, having another person to learn from short cuts your path to success. With someone to show you the ropes you can avoid many of the mistakes that come with inexperience.

 

So how do you choose a great mentor?

 

Jamie Oliver had a burning desire to make the world’s best pasta. Now that’s quite a goal when you consider he’s not Italian. He wasn’t after fame and fortune. He just wanted to make the world’s best pasta. And with his passion, drive and crystal clear focus, that goal led him to find Gennaro Contaldo. But finding Gennaro was one thing – getting Gennaro to agree to be his mentor was not so easy. It took persistence, strategy and making himself into the best mentee possible so that Gennaro couldn’t say no. Gennaro had so much experience and here was a young man who valued what he knew enough to want to learn from him. And because he believed in him, Jamie’s passion lit a fire in his mentor too. A win-win situation. Now as a celebrity chef with a string of restaurants spanning the world the rest, as they say, is history.

 

So if you’ve got a burning passion to do something, get really clear on what you want so you can find a mentor that’s the right fit. You might be amazed at who will turn up in your life when you really get focused. Then make yourself into the best possible mentee so when you approach them they can’t say no. Be persistent, be creative, be willing to sacrifice time wasting activities, be willing to listen, be willing to ask and be willing to be accountable – not only to your mentor but yourself as well.

 

A good mentor – mentee relationship is a winning combination. Terms like life-hack have become common place, but have you stopped to consider what they really mean?
To hack, or short cut, your way to success by using someone else’s knowledge and experience. To avoid pitfalls, to play to your strengths and improve your weaknesses because a more practiced eye is watching over you. What an idea!
Obviously that’s something we wanted to be a part of, so we set up a mentoring program of our very own. The basis for that program is to provide proven strategies for success, in any area, at a price that makes the decision a ‘no brainer’.
Why?
Because that’s how passionate we are about helping people, and we truly believe mentoring is at the heart of that.
If you agree, give us a call now.
Imagine how far you could go…

 

 

 

 

Aim higher, think bigger

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Have you ever realised that goals are meaningless when compared to who you have to become to achieve them? That’s the thing. It’s great to set goals, but really it’s all about what you achieve on the way to reaching them.

Because to reach a goal you’ve never achieved before you have to do something different. You have to break out of the habits that have been getting in the way. The things holding you back. The old beliefs. The old ways of thinking. The old ways of responding. You have to become someone different. You have to reinvent yourself in some way becoming a new and greater version of yourself.

Because to create something new in your life you first need to create something new within yourself.

That’s the great thing about having goals. Not only do they give your life meaning (which creates greater health and happiness), goals create the opportunity for personal growth. Because in striving for that goal we have to let our limitations go.

As Sir Edmund Hillary said, ‘We don’t conquer the mountain, it’s us we need to beat’.

Goals give us the chance to realise how really incredible we are. And that means you will ‘get’ a lot more than the goal – but only along the way.

Time to set some new goals?

It’s the law

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Did you know you people are twice as likely to cough at a concert than they are in day to day life? How weird’s that! And while it may be that people are just strangely uncomfortable at some level with sitting in silence (and cough to break it up), perhaps it’s because they are actually trying so hard not to cough that it actually makes the coughing worse. In some concerts they actually put a message across before the start telling people not to cough. No pressure there.

Have you ever tried not to do something?

It’s called the law of reversed effect. And basically this law states that the more we consciously focus on trying NOT to do something, the more we’re guaranteed to get it. In other words, what we resist persists.  And of course when you’re ‘trying’ are you really going to achieve it anyway? Trying is just plain hard work.

How many of you know someone desperate to achieve something and when they finally give up trying it all just seems to fall into place?

Understanding how the mind works is so important if you want to achieve your goals. Just think about it for a minute… if you’re trying not to do something where’s your focus? It’s on exactly what you don’t want to be doing. It’s on exactly what you don’t want to happen. And there bang in the middle of your mind is exactly the picture of what it is you don’t want! Talk about sending yourself the wrong message. How many people live their lives focussed on exactly what they don’t want? No wonder there’s so many unhappy people out there.

But what happens if we focus on what we do want instead? Get really clear on what we want out of life. What we want to achieve. We send ourselves a different message, don’t we.  We give ourselves a different picture to go after. And once we have that in mind, and we’ve taken all the action steps we need to, letting go and trusting our subconscious to go out there and make it happen, it really does take all the hard work out of it.

So next time you’re trying not to do something, take a minute and rethink it.

What are you trying not to do?

What could you be doing instead?

Timed to perfection

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So there are times in my life where despite my very best intentions, goal setting and strategy, things just don’t come off. Yep, it happens to me too. And for years it left me perplexed. But looking back I now see that there is a master plan at work. And given time with just a little bit of patience, okay, sometimes a lot of patience, things have a habit of falling into place perfectly.

So now I don’t sweat it so much. Well most of the time. Because I know that I just need to put out there what it is I want. Be really clear. And stay focussed, not waivering from what it is I really want. The things my soul yearns for.  Might need to tweak things a little, but for the most part just stay focussed.

Of course there have been times I’ve wanted to compromise because it’s just not happening quickly enough. It’s a huge temptation, isn’t it. To compromise on what’s really important to get things moving. But really it only sells us short on both happiness and that awesome feeling of satisfaction we get when we create a space for the things we really want… to actually happen.

One thing I’ve learned is the wisdom of the universe in its timing and delivery. And how perfectly my plans dovetail in with the intentions of others. Sometimes that’s what the waiting is all about. The universal intelligence at work.

In the end it all seems to work out just perfectly if I just stay focussed, give thanks and remain patient.

What’s your focus?

Will you stay the distance?

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. He will put some things behind, will pass an invisible boundary; new, universal, and more liberal laws will begin to establish themselves around and within him; or the old laws be expanded, and interpreted in his favor in a more liberal sense, and he will live with the license of a higher order of beings.”

Henry David Thoreau

Holding the intention

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There was a woman some years back who was dying to get to one of our fire walks. And she came with a very specific intention, something problematic in her life that she wanted to resolve.

Only problem was she arrived a day late and missed the whole event.

So after expressing a bit of frustration she got over her disappointment, got back in the car and drove home. Only to realise half way home a shift in her thinking so radical, she resolved her own problem.

You might wonder how this happened?

Well it’s all about intention.

Because intention creates opportunity.

Most people don’t realise that whenever you get a breakthrough, someone has just triggered your own inner wisdom. And that’s why you can learn something anywhere, anytime. And anyone or anything can be your teacher. Because when you set out to learn something, somehow or other you will. They don’t teach you that in school, do they!

The point is, you’ve just got to demand from life that it will deliver what you want.

But the flipside is that means you’ve got to know what you want.

You’ve got to spend time getting clear.

So a programme you attend will deliver whatever you intend for it to deliver. That’s why it’s so important to be clear on what you want. And why we ask people to prepare for our programmes by setting their intention. Just as I do. That you will get what you came for. Because just like the rest of life, if you’re vague, you could get anything.

Set your intention.

Do what you need to do.

Then let go.

What do you want out of life?

 

Looking Forward

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So last night we had great plans. A rare chance for a night in with a warm fire and a bottle of red. Just me and the girlfriend.

But as we all know even the best laid plans can come unstuck. And unstuck they did.

Being late home was just the beginning.

By midnight it seemed a lost opportunity.

As Mary reminds me, great expectations can set us up for disappointment. Because expectations set us up to believe things should be a particular way, don’t they. And in reaching for how we believe something should be, when clearly it’s not, we use a lot of effort. Effort of course sets up struggle.

Not a happy picture.

And while it’s important to know which direction you want to travel, being prepared to go with the flow makes it all that much easier to achieve. Much better to allow things to unfold rather than demand that things ought to be a particular way. Only to be disappointed when they’re not.

Which brings me to the whole point of the story… the way I handled the disappointment. Because that’s the only thing I really have any control over, isn’t it.

If I choose to be that person always looking back, I’d be stuck in the story. The feelings of frustration at the waste of an opportunity going round and round in my head. And in my body. I might lose another day over it. And if I’m really stuck, it could be a week or even longer. But if I choose to be the person who looks forward, I can be real about it and admit that it was a pretty shitty situation, but then ask myself, what can I do now? After all, there’s always another opportunity, isn’t there.

But opportunities can only be seen when I’m looking forward…

Where are you focussed?

Smorgasboard

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How crazy would it be to walk into a deli and tell them what you don’t want. After all, they’d think you were nuts if you walked in and spent half an hour telling them you didn’t want the salami, and you didn’t want the Roquefort, and you didn’t want the caviar and you didn’t want the pickles or the olives or the pastrami or the swiss. In fact they might be showing you the door. A sale in the ‘too hard he’s a nutter’ category.

But in my line of work that’s what I constantly see people do.

Worrying over all the things they don’t want…rather than getting clear on what it is they do want.

After all, the deli is just a microcosm of real life, isn’t it. Because everything that happens in the deli happens on a larger scale in life. Relationships, choices, transactions, fulfillment, disappointment. And the really great thing is when we realise we attract what we put our focus on we can do something about it.

Because if we spend our lives focusing on what we don’t want, is it any wonder it keeps turning up?

But on the other hand, life has a wonderful way of bringing to us the things we get really clear about. It just requires clarity and patience and trust.

Most people don’t realise life’s a smorgasboard. And there’s so much to enjoy.

So what do you really want out of life? And what do you need to get clear about today?

The Power of How

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And no it’s not a misprint. I’m not referring  to Eckhart Tolle’s book on spiritual enlightenment. I’m talking about the word ‘how’.

I wonder if you’ve ever realised it’s one of the most important words in the English language.

Want to know why?

Because it opens the mind.

Let’s say you want to go on an overseas holiday.  Teased by those tv adverts, or posters in travel agent windows that scream ‘book me now’ you want it so bad you can almost feel it. The sand, the mountains, the castles, the cocktails, the cruise. Whatever takes your fancy.

But there’s a problem… no money in the account.

So often the default pattern is to simply give up and say “I can’t afford it”.

But that only serves to reinforce the poverty mindset. Feels pretty ordinary when you think like that, doesn’t it.

So here’s a flash…

What happens if instead you ask the question “How can I afford it?”

Most people don’t realise the use of the word HOW in front of any thing opens up a whole new world of possibilities.

“I can’t” closes things down.

“How can I” opens things up.

HOW can I afford it?

HOW can I make it happen?

HOW can I achieve my goal?

This little word ‘how’ is a bit of magic. Because it enables that brilliant creative subconscious mind of yours to get to work to make it happen. It creates an opportunity.

So how will you put this to work?

The Missing Link In Goal Setting . . .

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Ever wondered why the goal setting process you are using isn’t working for you? Could it be that you’ve missed one of these two crucial steps . . .

If you want to succeed, you need to set goals. Without goals you lack focus and direction. Goal setting not only allows you to take control of your life’s direction; it also provides you a benchmark for determining whether you are actually succeeding.

Many of my clients, past and present, have done everything they’ve been instructed to do:-

• They set motivating goals and they know WHY it’s valuable and important for them to achieve it.
• They use the SMART format (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant/Realistic and Time framed)
• They commit them to paper and write them into their goal book – they add visually stimulating images to each and maybe even vision board them.

BUT the one thing they often neglect to do is –

Make an Action Plan

An Action Plan is a list of tasks that you need to do to complete a simple project or objective.

To draw up an Action Plan, simply list the tasks that you need to complete to deliver your project or objective, in the order that you need to complete them.

To do this, first brainstorm every step you’ll need to take to follow your task to completion.

This step is often missed in the process of goal setting. You get so focused on the outcome that you forget to plan all of the steps that are needed along the way. By writing out the individual steps, and then crossing each one off as you complete it, you’ll realise that you are making progress towards your ultimate goal. This is especially important if your goal is big and demanding, or long-term.

Action Plans are useful, because they give you a framework for thinking about how you’ll complete a project efficiently. They help you finish activities in a sensible order, and they help you ensure that you don’t miss any key steps. Also, because you can see each task laid out, you can quickly decide which tasks you’ll delegate or outsource, and which tasks you may be able to ignore.

Once you’ve completed your Action Plan, keep it by you as you carry out the work, and update it with additional activities if required.

Learning from Your Action Plan

If you think you’ll be trying to achieve a similar goal again, revise your Action Plan after the work is complete, by making a note of anything that you could have done better.

For instance, perhaps you could have avoided a last-minute panic if you’d alerted a supplier in advance about the size of order you’d be placing. Or maybe you didn’t allow enough time to do certain tasks.

This way, you’ll be creating your own systemised way of achieving your desired outcome every time!

Happy goal setting!
Cheers,
Deb Osterio